I know you're going to tell me, "It's worth it. That's why!". For some reason, that gives me little comfort. I have been suffering this kind of treatment and "brush-off" my entire life, with people trying to leave me holding the ball when it's nothing I have any ability to affect.
I know the rewards are right around the corner, but this corner feels like it's 50 billion Earths long and that I'll never get around it. After all, it's always been around the corner, but I've yet to taste a glimpse of this particular glory.
Therefore, I have to be very happy with all I've worked so hard and waited so long for and suffered so much for and only tasted a glimpse of that are not the real goals, not the real aspirations, not the real promises.
You, a different You from above, say that You won't let me suffer more than I can take. Do You know how close it's been how many times? You've seen me through those, but I am so weary. So. Weary.
Please, help my human spirit contend with all that I face and help me to wait just a little bit longer. You know I love You and that I believe in You. I need You to bring that to me right now, and not all the struggles and the evil that threaten to overtake me.
Please bring me renewed spirit, renewed capacity, renewed You, so that I can face this difficult time and come to experience Your true purpose for and in my life. Thank you for all that You have done and for all that You do.
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